We all have that voice in our head: the inner monologue that narrates our every thought and opinion. This ultimately crafts our view of the world around us, including our own self-perception. This voice of ours can assume many roles: our biggest fan, harshest critic, or a voice of reason. Maybe even our biggest confidant and our sole friend in times of loneliness (for those that aren’t too prideful to admit it).
I find that just as easily as we can be the president of our own fan club, we can be our own greatest nemesis. Picture this: you started a new job, and your boss praises you for a stellar performance thus far. You’re genuinely flustered. “I’ve successfully faked my competency,” you think to yourself. “It’s a matter of time before they realized I’ve bamboozled them.”
In my case and many others’, I am plagued by the tendency to belittle any sense of accomplishment that I gain. This is often under the (false) pretense that I don’t deserve my gratification, or that I’ve somehow managed to deceive everyone around me into believing in my worthiness. This manifests itself as feelings of anxiety, shame, and a whole lot of self-doubt. I doubt my abilities, I doubt whether my intentions are good, and I doubt that I deserve the good things I’ve been granted. This is commonly dubbed “impostor syndrome”.
However, allow me to share with my fellow sufferers a comforting sentence that I read: real “impostors” don’t experience impostor syndrome. It’s humane to experience feelings of self-doubt, but don’t assume that it’s because you are unqualified or undeserving. Learn not to be afraid of acknowledging your own merit, and make conscious efforts to celebrate your successes. When someone pays you a compliment, believe them.
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